By: Vianna Vivante
To avoid living in fear you have to question your fears. Are they actual fears of something that “will” happen or something that “could” happen? There is a huge difference between the two.
Living in fear of what “will” happen gives you an opportunity to possibly find a solution to manage that fear and a sense of pride that you were able to manage or even overcome the fear. An example is booking a trip and having a fear of flying. Planning coping strategies, or in my case taking a 1/2 tablet of Dramamine, helps with the experience. I don’t have a fear of flying; I haven’t yet learned to enjoy the experience.
Living in fear of what “could” happen is a torturous way to live and has detrimental effects on your health. Here is a present day example I have heard from many people: “Wonder if I get covid and become extremely ill or even worse, give it to a loved one with a compromised immune system and kill them… what am I to do?!” If that fearful thought comes to fruition you suffered more than once since you constantly played it over and over in your mind as an endless loop.
Most of the time what we imagine in our minds as potentially fearful experiences never manifest. But believing our thoughts and believing in our fears is what gives them power and holds us back from our full limitless potential.
Having thoughts is just what the mind does, but, attaching to the thought and ruminating over and over is what causes us to suffer unnecessarily. If you catch yourself doing this, correct the thought pattern. Begin to watch how you think. Gain control over the thoughts that flow through your mind.
Stay in the present moment… don’t rehearse the future and don’t attach yourself to fear. The more you practice this you will find that rehearsing the future in your mind over and over again, happens less often and you are able to go longer periods of time with a calm mind.
Constantly questioning your thoughts is a difficult exercise to do because you will realize it is something you end up doing all the time due to the volume of our thoughts. However, just like any form of exercise, the more you do it the easier it gets and you will notice the thoughts will pass by and you won’t attach as easily. I have seen a vast improvement with myself, however, it is something I have to stick with because my old habits constantly want to reassert themselves. The calm and peace within from continually analyzing how I think is a priceless reward for my efforts which take me on an internal exploration of myself to know myself.
Another insightful lesson! Thank you for taking the time to share your experiences. Much appreciated!